"Nothing but an out-of-business Perkins."

Nothing screams "Hank's book doesn't look so bad" in the face of a Mike Bianchi column slamming Tiger for not giving back to Orlando during his time living there. Considering what Tiger's Foundation has done in other cities, it's kind of hard to knock the guy on the giving back front, no?

Tiger moved last summer from Isleworth to an oceanfront mansion on Jupiter Island. And when I asked him if he missed Orlando, he replied: "I miss my friends, yes. But I love living where I live now. I'm on the ocean. I smell the ocean each and every day I walk out of my house, and the beach is just absolutely gorgeous there."

And there you have it.

After 15 fabulously fruitful years here in the City Beautiful, all Tiger can say to Orlando is … Surf's up!

Ah, one final kick in the knickers for Orlando: Not only did Tiger decide to take his talents to Jupiter Beach, he never even said goodbye and he left us with no lasting legacy that he was ever even here.

Not even the pancake house Tiger made famous in Windermere is open anymore. It closed a few months ago and is now a soon-to-be upscale sports bar. When I visited the other day, the first thing one of the remodelers told me was, "You know this place used to be Tiger's Perkins?"

Tiger's Perkins.

Maybe there should have been a memorial booth where he used to sit and order his favorite breakfast — legs benedict. At least that would be something to remember him by.