Flash: Tiger's Been Kidnapped By Hostage Takers Who Own Really Odd Art

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Love the minimalist hostage video and echoey sound for the fan question answering in lieu of a press session. The only thing missing is Tiger holding up today's newspaper.

The rigorous questions spread out over 14 minutes of your life you won't get back should you hit play. I will never make fun of a Tiger rally killer question again...

-How many practice rounds will you play at each course?

-What have you been working on since The Masters? "It's a great question?" Tiger says!

-What ratio of long game to short game practice do you do before a tournament? Reps and feels already mentioned at this point for those of you wondering how the drinking game was going.

-Which was your most memorable Players and why?

-Favorite shot at Sawgrass?

-What do you think is the coolest looking trophy of the four majors?

-What is in those little bottles you're chugging on the course? Electrolytes from Fuse, first sponsor mention!

-Love watching the videos from the oven, do you have any news on new products you're testing? Second sponsor mention!

-Have you ever had an albatross?

-Where does the "better than most" putt rank in 2001 compared with other putts you've made?

-What is your most memorable putt on tour?

-You won the Wells Fargo in 2007, how different would it be winning it this year compared to then?

-Do you still rotate from a 2-iron to a 5-wood depending on course setup or are you consistently putting 5-wood in the bag?

-How often do you attack the pin on 17 at Sawgrass or do you usually play it safe? ("That's a great question.")

-How much of your deciding to change your swing is designed to protect your knee?

-What is the difference between Bay Hill and The Masters?

-Are you anxious about returning to competition again?

-Do you have a good chance of winning?

-What are my thoughts about the next major, the U.S. Open at Olympic?